All I have any motivation to do is express my thoughts. I just completed a run around Central Park. And during the journey I composed in my head streams of words. I can’t recall any of them now but it was about coping with the others that occupy this world with us. Lately, many people who I come into contact with seem to be suffering under the weight of living. It makes me want to run away and surround myself with denial.

This is a time in my life where I feel the urgency, the desperation to act. Others are affected by me with strong emotion. In the past I have exploited this energy to give me courage and commitment to improve. Today I don’t seem to be able to refocus and accomplish the work. Too much contact, tomorrow I will go see my son play football in New Jersey. I will get there in a car with my ex and the man she married. God bless them, but I come to this encounter without the bravado. She humbled me when I stood tall now it will be a challenged just to survive. I am planning to tune them out with my MP3 player. I could take the train and ride my bike but I am challenged by the encounter. Tomorrow will tell.