Life goes by unnoticed. Work, chores, friends, we fill our hours carrying out the tasks. Weekends and holiday are a respite, a time to revel in personal joys which we work hard to afford. Though this is not how the time has evolved in my life—it held a mirror up to vacuum that existed. The cure was to push five into seven days and use the time for strategic expansion of my life’s purpose, a purpose consisting of programming, technology and mental skills.

Now on this beautiful Memorial Day weekend I contemplate other needs. Although I could finish reading a book on style sheets or implement a control that displays recent additions on my site, I don’t wish to. Holidays are to be shared by those you love, a time to reflect upon memories and feel thankful for the shared experience. Good food, a walk in the sun—a time of perfection. Or so the story goes, but this has rarely been my reality. Fulfilling these dreams have been as allusive as the “father knows best” on the TV screen.

So I am alone. I know what I don’t want. I don’t want to spent time bolstered by denigrating others. this effort to rise above it only reinforces the limitation that bound us. I don’t want to absorb the pain of others as a trade to end loneliness. All relationships require give and take and knowing how to set that balance requires relying on your feelings. Obstacles are always going to come into our paths, and good friends can help with compassion, advice and motivation. Where it does not work is when the relationship propagates inhibitions, loss of hope and fear.

How do we learn to accept each other as we are, in our heart, while making it possible for them to be all they can be? I don’t think I know how to do it. A book I just finished held some answers—be positive. Even when dealing with what we want to change, feel the light, show the light. Dream a future and a path to a brighter day, and in dreaming we just might realize we are almost there.

So I embrace my weekend not by thinking about what is missing, loved ones, but what I have, those that are in my heart now and in the future. Life is a precious thing I am not intending to waste; I see the rays of sun—bright and the trees of Central Park—green and softly moving in the wind. It is a great time to be alive, and I plan to make the most of it whether alone or not.